Being Big

Today’s Book Oracle

“Because her great bliss is imperturbable,
She is a mountain….
Because her cavern is filled with nectar,
She is a cave…..
Because she burns the views of early disciples and solitary achievers in the fire of great passion,
She is a cremating ground.” –from the Cakrasamvaratantra

I woke this morning with my darkness lifted, feeling bliss in my mind and body for the first time in many days. Nothing has changed in my external life—deep transitions and letting go of attachment continues to be the theme. But in my internal life….much has changed. Last night I was shown in shamanic journey that I must celebrate that intensity that I have been trying to hide. I’ve written the tantric poetry above on a piece of paper, and hung it on my wall, to remind me—my path is to be all that I am.

My journey took place last night in my shamanic healing class, where I learned to track and shift destiny paths for myself. I chose to work with my romantic destiny path, and was stunned by the number of choices I was shown. How wonderful! One path led to an ideal partner in a few months, but with a lot of bumps and bruises. Another led to him in the Spring, with a lot more ease. And a third path led to a slightly better-feeling version of my ideal, but it’s not yet clear what would have to change in my life to shift to that path. For now I’ve chosen the path of ease, and Spirit has shown me that to get there I must heal the wound of thinking I am too much, too intense, too talented, too big for any man to tolerate. That instead I must embrace and love my full creative, sexual, spiritual, and emotional expression and show it to the world. Stay tuned for more about that…